Wednesday 7 October 2020

Taiwanese Baseball Teams, evaluated

Want to visit somewhere cool that’s moderately off the beaten track, and that won’t make you feel sick thinking about the ethics of the people in charge? Visit Taiwan. It’s like China if you took away the weird, aggrieved communism and added some Japanese coolness. 

There’re a lot of reasons to go there. One of the less compelling reasons to go there is the love people have for baseball. Seeing this picture...

Some images just don't need context. N.B it's wearing a Corona-mask [link]

...of a salmon-head mascot reminded me reminded me about the baseball league, which is popular, but not without controversies. All the information is coming from this page here, so let’s get on with it!

Of course, there are 5 defunct ones, so let's rank them first, they're named as (the area or company that they represent) The Team Name

5. (dmedia) T-Rex 


This league started around the era of Jurassic Park, and much like the Toronto Raptors, is pretty obvious in appealing to that zeitgeist. Don’t get me wrong, T-Rexes are cool, but naming a team after them is pretty dull. Naming a team after a dinosaur famous for having tiny arms is just folly. It's no surprise that they're defunct. It was the hubris that killed it.

4. (China Times) Eagles  



Not bad. No one can fault you for choosing a predatory bird as a team name. The other day I just happened to see a sparrowhawk catch a sparrow, and it was just perfection in motion. Still, it's a good name, but there are better ones ahead. A shout out to the abstract alternative logo, too.

3 (Mercuries) Tigers  

 Another fine choice. Tigers are good luck in East Asian culture, and they’re beautiful. They’re bad luck to encounter in real life, and presumably on the baseball diamond (until they went bust, presumably). A solid choice.

2 (Macoto) Cobras  


A good name, a good logo. Can’t argue with that. I'd be very interested to see the mascot (a search yielded nothing Safe for work).

1 (Chinatrust) Whales


I’m a fan of this as a team name. Whales are pretty useless in a baseball sense, but the name is just weird enough to like it. This is the best so far. Also interesting is this possibly fan-made team logo,


 Which is cute. That's it for the defunct teams.

As we pause to remember those who have passed, let's celebrate the ones which are still there:  

 5. (Fubon) Guardians 

solid, but uninspired. I would have liked to have made that knight's helmet be more baseball-y. History suggests that they used to be known as the rhinos, and as the bears, both of which would be cooler. 

4. (Uni-President) Lions 



 I've put both logos there to show the mix of thought in Taiwanese society. One is hard and ferocious, the other is cute and kawai! Both aren't great. As a team name, it's just too boring. Again, Lions are fine, but there’s nothing inspired.

3. (wei Chuan) Dragons  

As a name, it's solid, though uninspired. I get it. I'm intrigued by the logo though, as his horns are incorporated into his helmet. Interesting.

2.(CTBC) Brothers 


 Brothers is a weird name for a team, and so it's worth remembering that this is 'the Elephant Brothers.' Elephants is a cool name for sure, and the term brothers is very enigmatic too. Good.

1.(Rakuten) Monkeys

Good. The name is great for a team. It's fun, interesting and uncommon. That’s what we should be after. Look at the logo above. And then look at the logo below. Which is better? You decide.



 Which is awesome. In conclusion, of the 5 best names, only 2 of them are still around.

P.S. I haven't updated this blog in many years. Welcome back me. More news soon.